Many of us walk around in a state of functional freeze in our nervous system. We aren't doing anything wrong per se but this is our nervous systems way of protecting us when we are under perceived threat. Ultimately it is not great for us to be stuck in this nervous system state because over time it impacts our health and wellbeing.
What does this feel like?
When I think of functional freeze the image is that of an owl. When an owl is under threat it sits very quietly and tries to blend into its environment. This is what I think functional freeze is like for those of us who are going about our business in a quiet way, here and paying attention but not interacting, sitting quietly like the owl not drawing any attention to ourselves. But inside we feel so, so numb.
Image - Stockcake
When we are in functional freeze we cannot be our authentic selves because we are pretending to be something else so no one notices us. We are trying to blend in. Like the owl that uses its natural features to camouflage itself, in humans the freeze response itself allows us to blend in, hidden in plain sight. Going through the motions, our authentic itself is not available for participation.
When I first learned about functional freeze I realised that there were many people I had worked with over the years who were stuck in this state and I would often think to myself when interacting with them, who are you really?
When I think of the times I have been in functional freeze, it's when I have been in really stressful situations in the workplace. I remember one time many years ago, the company I worked in was struggling through some tough external economic environmental pressures, so they started making people redundant. I was in the larger HR team so got pulled in to give the bad news. People are very unhappy, as you can imagine, to be losing their role. So the tensions were high in the workplace. I remember feeling really numb being in those meetings and just knowing that this was not good for me, but it was the best coping strategy I had at the time because the situation was extremely overwhelming for all of us involved and we had very little support or opportunity for co-regulation. But let me tell you there was a lot of co-dysregulation going on. I can smile about it now but it was not fun at the time.
So how do we get into the freeze state?
Freeze has many layers to it and functional freeze is the first level. Our freeze response kicks in when we are overwhelmed and can't access our fight and flight response. Maybe we tried using it and it did not work. Or maybe we go there because of an old trigger that has been ignited. Often it is something happening right now, that is reminding your autonomic nervous system of a thing that happened in the past. Your ANS goes to that old response, its like the scratch in the record, same old response, can't get away from it.
Maybe it is a scenario where your boss wants to talk to you, you immediately feel your heart pumping and your blood pressure whoosh and then you go super quiet. That old story - I am in trouble.
The thing is your Boss might be just wanting to talk to you about something confidential, not reprimand you. But maybe the way they spoke to you reminds your bodymind of a phrase a parent/caregiver used to use when you were much younger about to get in big trouble. It reminded your nervous system of a time when you were made to feel really small. This is all happening at the unconscious level.
Your bodymind doesn't even realise that this conversation that awaits isn't dangerous and it is has triggered a freeze response before you have got through the doorway of your bosses office.
In a scenario like this, we are experiencing fight and flight, anxious energy, sympathetic arousal and then shutdown activation of the freeze response, going numb, offline, you can't think and you are feel like you can't move.
This can be super confusing when we experiencing this combination and it can look like, being hyper alert, a panic attack, tension in the body and muscles, a lot of big energy in the body that feels stuck, short panicky breath and a sense of I want to and need to move but I can't. We can get home from work and find ourselves on the couch and we know we need to make dinner but we cannot make ourselves get up and cook.
I teach clients, how to recognise this and work with it, learn how to unwind the old pathway so you don't go there like the record scratch and we create new pathways so you have more choice in your system to respond to the demands of life. It is slow and gentle work and you learn tips for how to manage in your everyday life that will enable you to move out of it on your own, when you need to.
If you are interested in working with your functional freeze response that you know you might have, we can do that in coaching or somatic sessions because I work somatically in all my work, it depends on the base state of your nervous system and your broader goals which one is the right support for you.