Ep 14 Conscious Dating with Ana Kosta

I’ve watched many of my friends navigate new relationships in the past ten years. In this time of midlife one product of our personal growth is sometimes a fracture in our relationships. It is hard to grow together. Many of us started long terms relationships in our 20s and we kind of fall together, often lead by our desire for each other, without much thought to what we really want in our life and in a partner.

What I have observed is that dating in your 30s, 40s, 50s and 60s is so much different to your 20s. I thought this would be a perfect opportunity to talk to Ana Kosta. Ana is a Conscious Dating coach who works holistically with women to help them find a life partner.

Choosing a partner that allows you to have a depth in your relationship requires clarity around your desires both for your life and also of the qualities and values of your partner. Ana Kosta talks openly about her own experience and how she empowers her clients to find that clarity in their own life.

There are some beautiful reflective moments in this conversation as we contemplate creating conscious relationships in our midlife.

You can find Ana on her website www.anakostacoaching.com on instagram at @anakosta.coach and in her facebook Ana Kosta Coaching

Ep 13 Three Golden Opportunities with Dr Nic Pawley

Today I have Nicole Pawley with me to talk about the Three Golden Opportunities. Nicole is a Doctor of Traditional Chinese Medicine and a Birth Educator. The Three Golden Opportunities are three times in our life, as women, that are large inflexion points. Times where we have the opportunity to either foster or risk our health during the transition.

The Three Golden Opportunities are Menarche, Post Partum and Menopause. Chinese Medicine has a long history of menstrual and post partum care. The three golden opportunities are life gateways and periods of life where there is rapid change and a physical reaction. In Chinese Medicine we talk about Qi, Jing, Ying and Yang.

Chinese medicine seeks first to understand natural cycles, and then take advantage of them in order to optimise health and longevity - thereby avoiding future imbalances and making it easier to treat any that do occur. To understand why menstruation, postpartum and menopause are so key in terms of health preservation it’s important to understand the concept of Qi and Jing, which are essence or life force energy.

We are born with a finite amount of life force energy. Qi and Jing are like your bank account if you go hard and fast you will spend it all. Jing is there to help you move through these transitions. If you have a good amount of Jing you will have vitality. If you run hard life will be hectic and these transitions will be difficult. It is important to learn how to nourish and replenish our Jing and this is where pleasure practices come in.

In our practice of pleasure, both sensual and sexual, we replenish our Jing and nourish ourselves.

Our Western Culture is very yang, constant go and on. What is valued is productivity and achievement producing overworked, frazzled and burned out humans. This is detrimental to Women’s health; to everyone’s health. How can we be more Yin our life? Listen to the podcast and you will find out.

You can find Nicole on instagram @drnicpawley. Or you can message me and I can put you in touch with her.

Ep 12 Cyclical Living with Jaime Lauren

This week I have the wonderful Jaime Lauren, who is a menstrual and fertility awarenes coach talking about cyclical living for Women. I loved this conversation! I am a big supporter of cylical living for women and this is why I really wanted to do a podcast on it, it is something I teach in all my work.

Jaime runs a 10 week course of cyclical living and she does one on one work with women around fertility awareness. So what is cyclical living? It is designing your life around the menstrual cycle. This may seem a strange concept to us in the modern western world but women did it for thousands of years prior to the industrial revolution.

We seem to find ourselves in an epidemic of hormone related health issues and this shows up in many health issues in women from teenage years to the 80s. Health issues such as PCOS, endometriosis, infertility, fibroids, acne, IBS, early or difficult menopause, early puberty, sleep problems, anxiety, depression, hair loss and amenorrhea. I am sure there are more.

Understanding your cycle and living with it is, I believe, a big lever when it comes to self-love, self-acceptance and women stepping into their wild power.

You can find Jamie on Facebook in her Group Cyclical Living for Women, her website www.jaimelauren.coach or on instagram @menstrualmagic_

Ep 11 Movement as Medicine with Dianne Shepherd

Dianne Shepherd is back and today we are talking about Sensual Movement. Sensual movement is a non linear form of movement that is a great form of exercise, a meditative process and a source of great healing. It is particularly powerful for working with our pelvic floor and our core.

Dianne and I chat about all the different benefits of sensual movement. It is a great movement for women and so different from other forms of exercise that we do like Yoga or Pilates, that whilst working the core well, are very linear in their progression. Many of these forms of exercise work on the horizontal and vertical planes of the body, not the spiral. The pelvis is a spiral shaped bone, did you know that?

Sensual movement can also build great body mind connections between our brain and our pelvis. It builds life force energy and is a good way for women to build connection with their erotic part of themselves. This form of movement is a great way to work with our emotions and get them moving. Our Emotions are supposed to me in motion not locked up in our body. I have also found with some clients who have trauma in their body, it is a great way for them to work with that, for their body to titrate the energy of the trauma as it is unwinding from their body.

Dianne has a whole host of content on sensual movement in her website portal ‘The Goddess Vault’ which you can find on her website www.shakticore.com it is free to subscribe and you can become a member, just click on the link to get to her website. You can also find her on instagram @wildmenopause and on Facebook her group is The Goddess Vault.

Ep 10 Navigating Trauma in Motherhood and Midlife with Nisha Gill

Information and knowledge about Trauma has become very popular and accessible in the last 5-10 years . This is due to a few factors, greater scientific research and knowledge about the nervous system, the creation of a number of body based approaches to trauma resolution and the fact that there are a whole lot of individual practitioners who have trained in these body based modalities. New practitioners who have written books, started podcasts and started to run trainings both in person and online.

In this podcast, I am joined by Nisha Gill. Nisha is a Somatic Experiencing (trauma resolution) Practitioner who works at the intersection of trauma, birth, female sexuality & embodiment. She draws also from her background in integrative bodywork and counselling. Nisha has a special focus on birth, sexual, medical and developmental traumas through the lens of the nervous system. She combines her holistic tools for a highly tailored approach to body re-connection in the wake of trauma, illness, grief & loss, birth, menopause and other challenging transitions.

Nisha and I talk about what Trauma actually is, how people experience it in their nervous system. We talk about different causes of trauma, the different times in can show up in our life. Primarily, I wanted to talk to Nisha about birth trauma but we talked about a whole lot of stuff related to Trauma resolution work. We talked about developmental trauma and how this can become a big thing either in post-partum, or midlife transition through peri-menopause for us, as our body seeks healing and resolution. How do we know what Trauma responses look like? We explain what Somatic Experiencing is and how it supports individuals through trauma resolution.

This is an important podcast for me because I have coached many women who have unresolved birth trauma or developmental trauma and it can have a hugely negative impact on their life. In terms of the health and wellbeing, their body’s ability to heal and the quality of their relationships, both with their intimate partner and their family but also their broader community. I want to create as much awareness about it as possible.

Nisha and I have a strong relationship; I refer lots of people to her. She also supported me through chemotherapy as I chose to partake in Somatic Experiencing as one of the therapeutic modalities to support me and I believe it had a profoundly positive experience on my body’s healing. My work has a strongly trauma informed focus and I look forward to learning more about it.

You can find Nisha at her website www.feminineinstincts.com.au here facebook groups Birth Trauma Awareness and Feminine Instincts and on Instagram @feminineinstincts.

Ep 9 Becoming a Mother with Belinda Haan

Have you ever heard the word Matrescence? I hadn’t heard of it until a couple of years ago. It means the journey of becoming a mother. In this podcast I talk to Belinda Haan who is a coach and facilitator who runs the group The Motherhood Gathering. The Motherhood Gathering is a little different to your average mothers group; they do not talk about their babies. They talk about their growing pains and joys through the transition of creating their inner mother.

In the podcast you will learn the definition of Matrescence and the different contexts that our growth occurs within. We discuss the cultural and familiar boundaries and hurdles women face in this transition and we wonder why in the year 2021 is it really early days in understanding the complexity of this transition when women has been around since the dawn of creation. Or maybe is it that once it was understood but that ancient knowledge was dismissed in favour of science. Unfortunately it is a not an area the medical field has explored in great depth. Most research is on babies. One of the most challenging aspects of Becoming a Mother is the reconciliation between our projected fantasy of how we will be as mothers compared to how we are once the baby arrives. That and the wide spectrum of emotions we experience can be a lot to handle for a woman who is also sleep deprived and healing from birth with little support (which is often the case).

The reality is even many years after children have arrived we are always in the process of ‘Becoming a Mother’ it is a never ending learning process and our identity within that context constantly grows as expands.

Belinda’s website is www.themotherhodgathering.com and you can find her on instagram @thermotherhoodgathering. In the podcast we mention a new york times article ‘The Birth of a Mother’, click on the link to read it.

Ep 8 The Changing Rhythms of our Sexuality With Sasha Cueto

Today I am talking to the fabulously talented Sasha Cueto. Sasha is a Sexuality Empowerment Coach and Tarot Reader Extraordinaire. She does the most fabulous Tarot Card readings I have experienced.

Sasha and I had a grand old chat and laugh, there were dogs barking in the background on one end and construction sounds on the other. I managed to edit most of it out but I left you with a few dogs barking, adds to the realness of the chat I think.

We talked at the intersection of our work; Life Transitions Coaching and Sexuality Coaching. We covered:

• How our relationship with our body and our Yoni changes after giving birth,

• The grieving that happens when we go through life rites of passages,

• The Jade Egg as a tool to support you reconnecting with your body,

• How to reconnect with your eroticism post baby and during peri/menopause transitions,

• How to work through the changes going on inside without judgement,

• Replenishing life force energy as we age,

• The power of an empowered womans sexuality,

• The patriarchy being afraid of the midlife transition in women because they can no longer be controlled,

• The cultural view of womens transitions through rites of passage and;

• Reclaiming your sexuality.

You can find Sasha online, her website is www.thesexualitycoach.com , her instagram account is @sasha_cueto and her facebook is Sasha Cueto. The podcast is also on Spotify and iTunes.

Ep 7 Navigating the Grand Adventure with Ellen Clarke

Today I talk to Ellen Clarke who is a Life Transitions Coach. Ellen is also an Art Therapist, Emerging Death Doula and is in the third year of her Somatic Experiencing Practitioner Training.

We talk about the big rites of passage we have in our lives, both cultural and life stage rites of passage like ageing, death, divorce, motherhood and menopause. We wonder about how life might different for all of us if we had the support of community around us during these big transitions, to hold space for us when our own foundations are feeling a bit shaky and going through their own transformation. We ask questions about if we reframed some cultural transitions could they be easier?

You can find Ellen on Instagram at @ellenismagic, Facebook on her group page “The Grand Adventure” or her website www.ellenmay.com.au

Intro Music by Cam Stirling

Ep 6 Pelvic Pain: healing the bodymind way with Lorraine Faehndrich

Today I talk to Lorraine Faehndrich about Pelvic Pain. Lorraine is a Mindbody Mentor and Pelvic Pain Relief Coach. She specialises in working with women holistically to heal Pelvic Pain. Lorraine coaches women individually and also runs an online learning program called “Healing Female Pain Program’.

Lorraine works with clients who have pain in the Pelvis. That can be sexual pain, ovarian pain, urethral pain, vaginal pain, endometriosis, menstrual cramps, nerve pain such as pudendal neuralgia, pelvic floor dysfunction, structural pelvic pain, frequency and urgency issues.

Lorraine loves working with women with Pelvic Pain because she sees the underlying issue is often related to our relationship to our sexuality or to suppressed emotions. But most importantly her work is about connecting women with their body and the innate wisdom within it. She has found that as women we often guard and protect ourselves a lot in our pelvic area. Sometimes this has to do with our relationship with our sexuality or sometimes it can be emotions suppressed. Often this repression of emotions has resulted in a slight contraction of muscles and it has often been there most of our life. When we go through the bigger transitions in our life like having children, getting married, losing parents, perimenopause, these instances often bring the issue of repression to the forefront. It is experienced as pain.

This is a fantastic podcast, there is lots of great information for you to ponder when it comes to the innate power of our bodies to heal themselves. It will help you to start to think about how your body can be in charge of your healing; not your head which is the common held narrative that dominates healing.

You can find Lorraine at her website www.radiantlifedesign.com on instagram @lorrainefaehndrich or on facebook under Radiant Life Design - Pelvic Pain Relief for women.

Ep 5 Menopause - The Passion Portal with Dianne Shepherd

Menopause as a rite of passage seems to be poorly misunderstood by many people. It is not something many people talk about openly and so many women suffer in silence with physical symptoms that cause pain and exhaustion. Today I talk to the wonderful Dianne Shepherd about Menopause. We discuss her experience of it, what she learned in the process. Dianne is a holistic sexuality coach and astrologer. She coaches women through the midlife journey, teaches Jade Egg practice to many women to help improve their pelvic floor and reconnect with their Yoni. She is also an astrologer and gives fantastic readings.

There is so much wisdom and insight in this podcast from Dianne. You can find Dianne at her website Venus Rebirth or on instagram @venus.rebirth

Ep 4 Womens Empowerment with Julia Lally

Julia Lally and I have a great conversation about womens empowerment and sources of power. Julia is Sex and Power Coach who works with both men and women individually and also with couples. In this podcast we talk about what power is when we talk about womens empowerment and where power actually comes in this context.

Julia has created a coaching program that helps women find this. She believes that orgasm is a huge source of power for women. You will learn how connecting with your emotions and strengthening your nervous system will enable you to stand clearly in your personal boundaries. How getting clear on your desires and allowing yourself to receive is a huge source of power. Based in the UK Julia works all over the world and you can find her on www.julialally.co.uk, via instagram at @julialally or on facebook at ‘You can have it’.

Ep 3 What is happening to my body? with Sarah Smith Osteopath

Today we talk about what is happening to the musculoskeletal system as we move through midlife. I talk to Sarah Smith who is an osteopath with a special focus on womens health, in particular pelvic health. The thing I like about osteopaths is they take a very systemic view of the body. Sometimes I think menopause gets a bit of bum deal with many issues of midlife ageing blamed on menopause. In this episode, we explore why do so many of us start to have joint issues, pelvic issues, tendon issues and the like as we age. How do hormones affect collagen reproduction. We know that collagen affects skin but Sarah tells us how it really affects our joints too. We talk about gut health, prolapse and shoulder and hip bursitis. You will really get a sense of the interconnectedness of all the systems within our body and that the body has its own innate healing capacities.

If you would like to connect with Sarah you can find her on instagram @sarahsmithosteo or through her clinic www.movebeyond.com.au

Ep 2 How does Traditional Chinese Medicine view Menopause with Nicole Pawley

Today I speak to Nicole Pawley who is a Traditional Chinese Medicine practitioner. I am curious about how menopause is viewed in the TCM world and how they treat it. I learned that TCM has a very bespoke way of treating menopausal symptoms in fact all symptoms that present in an individual, which is probably why I really like the approach myself. It makes a lot of sense really because we are all unique individuals and no two bodies are the same. You can find Nicole on Instagram at @drnicpawley or at SoulPod Health and Healing in Richmond, Australia. www.soulpod.com.au

Welcome to my podcast

A little introduction to my podcasts and what they are all about. I am a sexuality, love and relationship coach and I work with women to help them transition through midlife. I find midlife to be a time where many of us unravel. Relationships become challenging, some of us experience health issues, many of us really start to question what our life is all about and seek to move deeply toward work that is more purposeful. On top of that Women move through the rite of passage that is Menopause. This is something that few women openly talk about, historically it has been hard to find information, although this seems to be changing. I want to open up discussions around this and empower women to move through this stage of life with greater ease.